tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-966221383541597818.post8794470306217939379..comments2012-11-02T16:06:08.292-07:00Comments on My Second Chance {Results Not Typical}: Christmas with Early Onset Alzheimer'sAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18371460521094647381noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-966221383541597818.post-27102247846377244022011-12-25T12:07:16.215-08:002011-12-25T12:07:16.215-08:00Hey aunt Karen, thanks for sharing. I went throug...Hey aunt Karen, thanks for sharing. I went through those feelings during my first divorce, and it was awful. This is totally different, symptoms are way different, but still difficult. I hope you have a Merry Christmas!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18371460521094647381noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-966221383541597818.post-76941755729515952462011-12-25T10:19:06.679-08:002011-12-25T10:19:06.679-08:00Kristy,
I want to tell you how I felt and see if ...Kristy, <br />I want to tell you how I felt and see if you feel anything like this:<br />When I left Lonnie, something happened to me inside. I felt like someone had reached inside my chest and ripped out my heart. There was a void. It was stunning to me that in my brain I knew who I was and had always been. What my likes and dislikes are, but my heart was gone. No connection between what I knew in my brain and what I should be feeling with my heart. I even turned my back on God. I decided there may not be a God, and if there was, He surely must hate me to let me feel this way. I had to take anti-depressants to help my heart and brain connect again. I didn't trust myself to do anything, not even drive. I would be terrified getting ready for work knowing I had to drive there and face the traffic each way, but I did it anyway because I didn't want anyone to know how bad I was feeling. When I would go to sleep, I would be disappointed that I woke up. I wanted to just disappear. It is the worst feeling I have ever felt in the world. My whole world had crashed and I was traumatized.<br />Are those some of the things you are feeling? If so, I am so sorry for you. It is miserable, and of course, we have to put on the "I'm okay" face for the world to see.<br />I found in my Anatomy class that stress had so much to do with what I was feeling and that stress will break down your body from the inside out. Please research the word 'stress' and see if it fits your symptoms. We can be under so much stress and not even realize it. It can stem simply from guilt we have buried. <br />I pray you do not have EOA. That's just not you!! <br /> Five years after I wondered if there was really a God, of course, because He IS God, and He loves us even though we can be rebellious children sometimes, like the prodical son, He PROVED to me that He exists and that He loves me. <br />I know that He loves all His creation and that includes you. He holds you Kristy and He has the answers. God uses others to get His message out, and to help His children. I hope this has helped you, or at least made you feel not so alone.<br />A short story:<br />There were 10 people that God was visiting with. He told them to sit in a circle. Then He told them to write down all their problems. They did. He told them to put the papers in the center of the circle. Then He instructed them one by one to go to the center and choose which set of problems they prefer. As they looked through all the papers and problems, each one decided to choose his own set of problems, feeling that the other lists were just too heavy. <br />The moral is; God will not give you more than you can bear. Life is a learning place...we never arrive at a perfect place, we just have to enjoy the journey. <br />Your mom told me you don't like me and I do not know what I have done to make you feel that way. If it is something I have done, I am sorry and ask your forgiveness. If you just don't like my personality then I can do nothing about it. I am sorry to interfere but do so hope that this will help you in some way feel better because misery is nothing to make light of.<br />Aunt KarenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com